Hi, Stepparents! I know that for me, it hasn’t always been easy to get support in my stepparenting role. More accurately, it’s been downright challenging.
Most of the people in my world couldn’t relate to or even fully understand what I was going through. They didn’t know about the constant juggle I was experiencing. Not only the physical juggle, but the emotional one as well. In addition to my stepparenting responsibilities, there was work, day-to-day essentials, and trying to do something to keep my sanity.
The Key to Stepparenting Sanity
I realized over the years that keeping my sanity and maintaining even a bit of calm was the most important component that would make or break my day. I had to learn to be present if I was going to effectively take care of the many to-dos on my list without starting World War III.
Learning how to find and stay connected to that calm was essential in relieving many needless blended family conflicts. Fights that started over tiny things—like washing your hands when you come home—often quickly turned into blowouts between my partner and me.
After the storm had settled, and I had reflected on how and why things escalated so quickly to such a drastic point, I realized there were moments where I was triggered, jumped to a conclusion, or made an assumption.
Those things didn’t actually exist. They weren’t said or even implied, but I read them as such in the heat of the moment. I’m not saying that the misunderstanding only happened on my end; my partner contributed to things as well. But, I focused on my end of things because that was the quickest path to getting results and lessening the chance of these situations happening again in the future.
How to Develop a Stepparent Sanity Routine
I started to develop a morning routine. It’s changed quite a bit throughout the years, and now I’m able to be pretty fluid with it because I’m relatively in touch with what I need. But, in the beginning and over the years, I tried a lot of different things to help with emotional regulation.
The key for me was consistency and sticking with each practice for a good while before moving on. I tried things like:
- Yoga and running
- General exercising
- Meditation and journaling
- Dancing and listening to music
- Reading
I realized that creating sustainable habits was the key. Whatever I did to get myself to that calm place was how I was able to find it. And by establishing that initial connection every day through healthy habits, I was able to reconnect to that grounded place throughout my day.
As I built these habits and utilized them regularly, that connection with feeling grounded strengthened. I was able to access that deep ocean of calm instead of flailing in the choppy waters at the surface.
Don’t Wait for the Storm to Hit
My VIP clients also tell me that the true key to stability and calm is not waiting until something challenging takes place to find a way to cool down.
Instead, the secret is to create supportive routines and learn go-to tools that you can rely on for support during those inevitable stressful moments.
If you’re struggling to maintain your cool due to anxiety, anger, or fear, grab a Rapid Resolution Therapy® Session with me to get unstuck and create more energy and resources for your stepparenting role. You can book that at synergisticstepparenting.com.
I hope you found this episode helpful. Give these suggestions a try and reach out to let me know how it goes. I’d love to hear your feedback! Until next time, be well.
- Related Episodes:
- 7 Key Components Of A Stepparenting Sanity Routine
- Stepparenting Feels Like A Culture Clash
- What Is Rapid Resolution Therapy?
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